What's Really Going On Here?

Wow, friends, it's been a wild ride the past few weeks.  So much has gone on, so many uncontrollable things that happen on this ride of life, right?  So many things that have so many emotions and feelings attached to them - we are complicated people, aren't we?   Let's see, this month has consisted of my dad being in the hospital and learning more about his next steps, a church 20somethings reunion in Chicago, my mom's birthday, a husbands full work schedule, a 20 year high school reunion and this coming weekend, a business trip out of state.  So, lots of opportunities to "look back" and revisit where I was and where I am now, which is always interesting and enlightening for various reasons. {On top of regular life, you know?!}

The hard part about blogging is that I don't want to say too much to hurt or offend anyone ever, but also need to share the story and the message I believe God wants to be shared.  I don't want to make it about a person or call anyone out, so this post might be vague due to that very reason.  Hopefully it will make sense and the message will come through as it should.  So, here we go.....

There was an instance recently where someone did something that was very hurtful to me.  {We have talked it through, made amends, asked for forgiveness and all is well, just so you know.}  However, in the process of stepping back and evaluating the situation that occurred, I had to ask "what really is going on here?  What am I upset about?  Is it the situation that happened, or the feelings that the situation brought up?"  Well, that's the answer right there, the feelings the situation brought up.  So, yes, I was upset with the choice {s} that were made,  However, I have to realize I am not in charge of other peoples actions.  At the end of the day, I am only responsible for my own choices in life. This truth is both hard, but also freeing at the same time.

Back to the situation at hand....this choice that occurred brought up so many past hurts in me ~ rejection, neglect, disappointment, feeling of not being "enough," being let down, and so on.  So, those are my issues which I am aware of and own up to. 

However, when we as people interact with other people, sometimes our issues rub off on each other, just like what I'm talking about. See, this person didn't intend to do this at all, and wasn't their goal or mission at all, but because we are human beings, it happened. Their choice/action/decision/behavior brought up my past hurts.  Make sense?  It's a hard and delicate place to be for sure.  While I know the intent wasn't there, the hurt still was.  So, what does one do with that?  I'll tell you what I did:

* Pray
* Talk with a trusted friend who is removed from the situation so they can share their perspective on it and speak truth objectively
* Spend some time thinking and evaluating what is going on and what is the cause of all of this
* Talk with the person who has caused the hurt once the situation has diffused and everyone is calm

I hope this helps someone.  If not, it was good for me to verbalize this for sure.....thanks for reading friends.  Hope you all have a great week!